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Are You an Introvert Or Are You Just Shy?

Published on January 20, 2021

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Are You an Introvert Or Are You Just Shy?

This pandemic has forced us to stay indoors and avoid people. So now are we all automatically introverts? Does this classification of behaviour even hold true? Will we be introverts or extroverts after the pandemic is done? Will we shake hands with strangers at a meeting? Will face to face meetings even happen? Will Zoom dictate all our social interaction? Will college classrooms be with lesser people?

Well no one really knows. But one thing is for sure, this hard classification of being either an introvert or an extrovert is going extinct.

For the longest time, it’s been easy to categorise a quiet person as an introvert and a talkative person as an extrovert. Parents and teachers play their part by reinforcing these stereotypes, because it was done to them as well. The truth is that most of us are Ambiverts, which means that we have some features of extroverts and some of introverts. And almost everyone would agree to that. Carl Jung, who came up with these terms, himself said that nobody can be a 100% extrovert or 100% introvert.

So wait, what is an introvert or extrovert? Simply put, an introvert is someone who gets their energy from being alone and an extrovert is someone who gets their energy from being around other people. Now this is also related to how our individual brains are wired, so there is nothing wrong with being either. You can’t control this aspect.

But a lot of it also has to do with social engineering, which we can control. Most often people who think they’re introverts are actually shy and scared. You’re afraid of being embarrassed or failing, so it’s easy to retreat into books and spend time alone. True introverts choose this alone-time, because they need that time to think. Bill Gates is an introvert, but he deals with millions of people across the world. Elon Musk is an introvert. Meryl Streep is an introvert, but she gets up in front of the camera for a living.

So think about it, are you an introvert or are you just shy?

Introverts tend to be bold, aggressive and intelligent. They just need to go to a lakeside cabin to recharge, and not a party. Many famous people are introverts, but they still work with groups of random people. Sure it can be awkward, but they still get the work done.

When you’re in high school, you might see this image of being an introvert as an identity to have, so you take it. Then people double down and tell you not to be quiet and aloof. So you go even deeper into this hole of being an ‘introvert’. An image often develops that the loud ‘extrovert’ behaviour is rewarded, so you might even form a negative association with being an ‘introvert’.

Now nobody is telling you to be someone you’re not. But unless you explore, there is no way to know who you really are. Rejecting something without trying it, or for the wrong reasons, is not the way forward. Especially after this pandemic.

When you’re in college, you’re going to have projects and study groups with other students. Are you going to wear the badge of being an introvert and reject them? Or will you make an effort to connect with them, and create bonds with people apart from your friends and family. When you join an office, are you going to reject your colleagues? Just because you believe that you’re an introvert? An actual introvert would engage with all of them, but recharge their battery alone at home. Don’t run away from confrontation and collaboration. Don’t let your fear of judgement masquerade as being an ‘introvert’.

Again, this doesn’t mean that you need to hit the next party you’re invited to. It just means that maybe you need to find hacks to be more adaptable. Maybe learn to be more honest with yourself and even others. Maybe you need to learn how to converse with strangers. Often, in large groups, we try to speak to everyone or no one. Next time just try one or two people, but truly engage with them. See what might come out from that. See if you learn something new about yourself. Maybe you’ll reject these tags of ‘introvert’ and ‘extrovert’. And maybe you’ll realise that enjoying solitude is a strength, not a weakness.

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Listen, Don’t Just Hear

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Listen, Don’t Just Hear

‘Be quiet and listen.’

I think we’ve all heard this throughout our lives, and sometimes still do. It can seem like a reprimand, or a dull repetitive sound, based on how many times you’ve heard it and who’s saying it. Most often it’s teachers or parents.

But they aren’t the same thing.

Being quiet and listening are two entirely different actions. This is a myth which has been drilled into our head. And I’m sure the more you think about it, the more you realise how false it is. How many times have you sat quietly in class, but zoned out from your teacher.

And that is the biggest drawback of our high schools. We are never taught how to listen. We have to be quiet during assembly or class, but apart from that we are taught to be ‘Good Orators’. Listening doesn’t really figure in our school’s priorities. You can’t really quantify a good listener, you can’t give a certificate or an award, and you can’t have a high school student stand up on stage and just ‘listen’.

So we need to learn this skill on our own. Why? Because that’s the only way to learn. To actually learn. Not exam syllabus learn, but practical learning which you can actually use in your life. We might think that we’re great listeners, but nobody is going to tell you if you’re not. Only you can figure out if you’re giving the other person enough time to talk.

And it’s important to do that. People are attracted to good listeners because they feel like they’ve been truly heard. People often go deeper and share things that they haven’t before. That forms deeper bonds. Now just imagine the same thing in a work environment, or in a college environment. That’s how you build lasting relations.

We’re often afraid of letting that silence hang in a conversation, so we quickly rush to fill it. We also get that sense of FOMO that we’ve spoken to this one person enough, we need to move on to something else or someone else. We are that restless generation, and this is a good way to just slow down.

Consider this, can you be a musician if you don’t listen? Listen to other musicians? Or to what you play yourself? It’s the same thing. Listening is engaging with another person, and giving them your focus, allowing them to speak. If you want them to listen to you when you talk, why wouldn’t you do the same? Even if you disagree with someone if you let them talk you allow them the space to breathe, making them more receptive to your thoughts. Otherwise, it’s just two people talking over each other and nobody listening.

So why bother about this while you’re still in high school? Because good listeners make great future leaders. Think about it. If you go to a leadership workshop, would you listen or talk? If you wanted to start a business and went to an entrepreneurship workshop, would you listen or talk? A leader is someone who takes the time to listen to people, understands the problem, and then comes up with a solution. What kind of leader comes up with solutions before he even hears the problem? That is a recipe for disaster and bankruptcy.

Now how do you become a better listener?

  • Give them your attention. Make eye contact, but don’t stare daggers at them.

  • Don’t interrupt, let the other person complete their point.

  • Ask questions that cut deeper.

  • Read their body language. Listen to the non-verbal cues as well.

  • Check your own body language. Don’t stand with folded hands or move restlessly.

  • Use affirmative responses to let them know you’re with them.

  • Don’t give moral arguments that can stop a conversation.

Nobody likes a person who talks too much. But another way of looking at it is that nobody likes a person who doesn’t listen enough. This is something you learn over a period of time, generally by making mistakes. But you’ll get there. Always remember that a good conversation isn’t between two great speakers, it’s between two great listeners.

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blog Higher Education | 3min Read

3 Ways Of Going About Your Career

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3 Ways Of Going About Your Career

Just like a coin, a dice, or any other multifaceted thing in the world, there’s never only one way to go about doing things. Conventionally? Yes. However, realistically? No. Similarly, there are numerous ways to go about making your career. We like to assume that most of them have been discovered, but in today’s ever-changing times, we shouldn’t be surprised if a new, never-before trodden career path emerges because of some kid who believed in their abilities.

We dug into this matter further and discovered 3 profound ways of embarking upon your career.

1. Bolting

The people who sprint through their careers are usually characterized as being ready, willing, and able. Such students start early. They select a degree and stick with it, allowing them to learn and advance through internships that look more and more impressive each year. Some people have the dream job waiting for them after graduation; others with eagle-like excellent long-distance vision concentrate and move from one job to the other, up the career ladder. They have little to no student loans, which helps them in choosing jobs without regard to pay. But pace is not the only defining characteristic of this group. Some are unrushed but methodical, putting together the building blocks for a promising career by investing in personal capital, possibly in graduate or vocational schools, before the job market is hit.

2. Strolling

These are students that are unsure and pursue an uncertain path. Usually, this involves lesser planning or a sudden lack of interest in their previously chosen profession. In today’s world when the master’s or postgraduate degree has become the new bachelor’s degree, it has become even harder to plan and select one major that would enhance our capabilities for the job market post-graduation. Even after that, about 30 percent of college graduates are back in school within two years. Graduate school offers structure and guidance. These students usually have a blurred idea of what they want to do with their lives, and more often than not do not consider a gap year as a practical option to discover their interests or explore majors in different ways due to the conservative thinking of their parents. However, after much pondering and understanding, they too find their perfect fit for a career.

3. Drifting

Many stragglers struggle after high school to find viable career choices. They either choose to stay home and get work or enter the family business if that’s an option. They might hop, skip and jump from one career path to another. However, a longer life expectancy for today’s children means that we could define new paths to adulthood in various ways. We should no longer think of college as a place in our lives that must be visited at 18 years of age. Nevertheless, educators and advisers keep pushing families on a one-size-fits-all route. It is nearly inconceivable to think differently on when a college education should take place as a parent in our hyper-competitive society — the result is that it has become more difficult than ever to forge a path to a satisfying career and a meaningful life. We may also argue that the pathway is more gradual and varied than it was a few decades ago. Traditional milestones like marriage and parental ties are now not the beginning, but the end of adulthood.

No career journey is inferior or superior to the other, it might only take a little longer or quicker in terms of pace and age before you get there. And as long as you have faith in yourself, you will harness the abilities and skills needed to develop a unique and shining career that is tailored to your liking like none other.

Furthermore, the issue is that colleges have sought to improve the predictability for a four-year experience by incorporating substantial guidance and related programs so that basically everything is done to ensure that students graduate and then secure a job. However, this also discourages students from gaining the strength they need to handle risks as adults and excel in an unforeseen profession. There are also career counselling programs for students that are curated to help you identify the right career for you.

Do Entrepreneurship interest you? To pursue their dreams of becoming an Entrepreneur, you can learn leadership skills and join an entrepreneur program to build an empire in your teenage or continue to chase your passion.

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Essential for Online School 101

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Essential for Online School 101

An online ‘life’ has become the new norm- be it shopping, studying, entertainment, or anything that could possibly strike your mind, right now, you name it, is being done in an online mode. Therefore, rather than sitting on it, we should embrace it and look into more efficient ways to go about living our lives in this new virtual manner. And the best group to start with undoubtedly would be the youth, the students of today, who consume and use it more than any other age group or profession. Here are six essential points that would help you spend your school life in this pandemic swimmingly.

1. Stable Mental Health!

Imagine dreaming to visit a theme park for the longest time and finally getting there, but with a fractured leg. It would be the same as rushing to accomplish your ultimate goal, but with poor mental health. It would eliminate pleasure and intention, making it worthless in the end. The value of mental health can never be stressed upon enough. Similarly, in this pandemic schooling season, it’s healthy to strive for the best whilst at home, in a completely unusual study environment, but if you don’t strive equally for a healthy mind, you will take the burden of it beyond your schooling years.

2. Separate Workspace

Quarantining anywhere can most definitely drive you insane, regardless of how relaxed and comfortable the environment might be. Therefore, separating the study and recreation areas in your house is highly important. You can find yourself in confusion when you work, sleep and watch tv at the same place. Designating specific areas to these tasks will not only help you gain clarity but also establish a sense of routine similar to a disciplined and supervised school environment.

3. Change Of Clothes

Routine is vital to our mental health, and it’s an important part of this routine to get dressed. The idea of sticking in PJs every day has some negative consequences, and so when we do so we can start to feel lazy and demotivated, which in turn contributes to a lack of productivity and low levels of operation. However, relaxed clothing also has its pros. If our subconscious mind is not disturbed by being aware that our pants are tight or that our shirt is uncomfortable, it creates room for our mind to completely focus on the tasks at hand, thus increasing cognitive efficiency. Therefore we need to learn to adapt and strike that balance between formal and loungewear for ourselves at home.

4. An Offline Hobby

Although all tasks and entertainment being completed online could have their share of fun, it is also important to remind ourselves to take a step back from the virtual world and reunite with the several hobbies and recreation activities that do not require any gadgets-just as we did back in our schools where no personal gadget was allowed. It could be playing your favorite sport or even an indoor game. This way you would achieve a work-life balance, and also harness other skills that might’ve been forgotten in these chaotic times, giving your eyes and mind a much-needed break.

5. Cleaning Our Laptop/PC

In a time when screen-time on our gadgets has almost tripled, it is hard to keep track of how much time we’re spending in being productive and how much we’re wasting in entertainment. Therefore, a quick hack to keep ourselves in check is to uninstall all entertainment apps from our laptops, making it free from spamming WhatsApp messages from friends while we’re trying to focus on our school assignments and blocking sites like Netflix and others to only access it on your tv or other gadgets during your break. This will allow you to remain focused and increase productivity.

6. Attitude Towards School Online

It can undoubtedly be said that the transition from an offline and regulated environment to an online and unsupervised one has created an overall shift in our attitude towards school, assignments, and examinations. The seriousness and sincerity with which students tackled school before the pandemic is not the same now. We must keep this point in mind at all times and also the fact that even if our mood is not the same, the grading and academic system with which the schools and colleges function will remain the same. Hence, to perform equally well online, we’d have to have the same attitude as before, or else it would add to the long list of problems we have accumulated during this pandemic.

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blog Higher Education | 3min Read

How The Pandemic Can Boost Your College Applications!

Published on January 4, 2021

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How The Pandemic Can Boost Your College Applications!

It is safe to mention that the pandemic has undoubtedly reshaped the manner in which colleges look at the application process. However, in instances like this, it is natural to overlook the benefits this situation has brought to us. Having to juggle Senior school classes alongside a very vigorous college application process places an inconceivable weight on young shoulders.

Furthermore, this could naturally be demotivating for a lot of graduating students who had been preparing for university in advance and are now having to face unprecedented challenges.

The good news: “Faculties are going to be far more flexible this year,” says Todd Rinehart, president of the National Association for College Admissions Counseling.

Here are a few pointers that will help you use this last-minute ‘extrade of rules’ to your advantage.

1. Most Indian Universities Have A Merit-Based Admissions Criteria

In the race of bagging accolades to their name so as to qualify for certain colleges that require a high standing in these non-academic features along with high grades on a student’s application, a primary factor that numerous college students lose track of is if you’re aiming to get into an Indian University, you aren’t required to provide your extracurricular activities (ECA) certificates at the time of your admission. This fact should be taken into account, provided that a big number of students who had initially been intending to study overseas are opting to stay in India for their undergraduate studies.

2. Most Universities Have Become SAT-Optional Or SAT-Blind

Not too long ago, the College Board, conductor of the Scholastic Aptitude Test, announced that keeping the pandemic in mind, the universities would most likely not give the same weight it did to the aptitude tests, earlier. They have asked colleges to extend score deadlines for early action and early decision to take some pressure off students and give them more time to test and send their scores. Additionally, they’ve requested colleges to recognize that students who do submit scores might not have been able to test more than once. (e.g., taking into account that students who tested as high school juniors but who could not as seniors would have likely achieved score gains). Additionally, The University of California and several other universities formally declared their admission process to be SAT blind, i.e. applications containing SAT scores would no longer be favored.

3. More Number Of Opportunities Online

When seeking to boost our university applications, we generally tend to search for any and every volunteering, internship, and/or conference opportunity to participate in. Luckily, this pandemic has taken all of these activities and much more online! Reputed organizations are starting to arrange and conduct their conferences, seminars, and debates virtually, thereby giving us the upper hand through having the ability to participate in more activities than we might otherwise have in an offline environment. The price and inconvenience of moving to another city or country has been absolutely wiped out and you can still get a legitimate certificate sent to your doorstep.

4. There Is No Better Time To Explain A Gap Year!

Earlier, Gap years used to be a hush-hush topic, almost a taboo, amongst graduating students. However, this year has seen more students deciding to take a gap year than any other before. Be it your mental health, indecision regarding your field of higher studies, financial difficulties, or just an urge to take a break — this year has got your back! Your reasons for taking a gap year, the projects you undertook and how you learnt through the process is not only going to be easier to work out but also more legitimate and generally accepted on your college application now than it used to be.

Several important factors like colleges’ refusal to reduce tuition fees even though education has transitioned onto the online platform, constant and spontaneous travel bans, and the uncertainty of health at this time have put parents under pressure as well. Sending off their loved ones in these distressing times can be extremely difficult. Taking a step back to reflect on some of these points could help ease that stress! Remember, no application is more important than you are.

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