NYAC | 3min Read
Published on May 6, 2026
Finesse Fatigue
Finesse Fatigue
Only a few hours remained to be passed in a frantic haze before all my efforts came to fruition in a day. The big day loomed as I sat oblivious to the external universe in deep preparation. As my fingers flew across the piano keys in a flurry which had long since attributed itself to muscle memory, I became aware of a slight disarray in my otherwise mechanical demeanour.
Lost in the endeavour of making each note immaculate, I remained absentminded to this disconcerting sensation. It seemed determined to establish its prominence and presence, and before I comprehended it, my head pounded in a spiking crescendo of red-hot misery. My body had eventually let go after days of relentless practice. I understood that in my present condition, all possibilities of appearing at the ‘Music Meltdown’ were non-existent. My condition was a severe one. Along with the penetrating pain in my head, I experienced excessive fatigue to the extent that I felt less connected to the world than during preparation.
I was ravaged by frequent bouts of slicing pain in various regions of my body.
The most awful aspect of this episode was the consciousness that my perseverance had terminated in failure. I am extremely passionate about music, and the competition would have served as an avenue to showcase this eagerness to the world while exploring unique perspectives and gaining knowledge from other talented performers. Listening to music to keep my mind off the hellish pain was bittersweet as I knew that the melody ebbing from the speakers of my piano is what I should have been hearing.
I had engaged in rehearsal for over a month as of writing. During this duration, every day was devoted to either polishing the composition or enhancing my technique to deliver the piece in a flow of emotion and grandeur on the day of the competition. I consumed food in my room, the plate unbalanced on the frame of the instrument, homework was completed in the early hours of dawn, and socialisation was imperceptible during this period.
Every breath of effort had terminated in this. I had relentlessly pushed only to run out of fuel at the finish line. I realised I had pushed so devastatingly intensely that not only had my energy drained, it had compromised my very being while doing so. I had ignored my wellbeing; so my wellbeing, in a twisted turn of fate, ignored me. Today, as I push out feeble resonance, a speck of what my ascendancy was a month ago, I climb the peak of recovery, but slowly, with breaks, and most importantly, taking inventory of my supplies every now and then.
Although the outcome was a speck of irrelevant dust compared to my mountainous expectations, I have retained several crucial lessons. Not only was it a journey of discovery down the serene road of the musical world, but it also taught me that our bodies need taking care of, and just like we give way under tremendous pressures and burdens, they can too.
